January 18, 2020

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I watched a new movie on Amazon Prime Video, and it is FANTASTIC!

Troop Zero. Is. A. Must. Watch!

Troop Zero is an incredible tribute to weirdos. Everyone should watch.

Run, don’t walk, to your television and watch this incredible movie.

OMG you made me cry, on the treadmill, at the gym in front of strangers. Didn’t see that coming. Thanks.

I’d put my daughter in Jim Gaffigan’s troop any day!

Viola Davis and Allison Janney must star together in every single movie in existence moving forward.

Just the many wonderful words from the Twitterverse

Viola Davis is wonderful, number one. Number two, the viral sensation Johanna Colon’s character is called Smash. McKenna Grace makes you fall head over hills in love with Christmas makes a solid number three. 4. Hello-No Price kicking butts and taking names. 5. Joseph rocking what God gave him. 6. Anne-Claire, will save your soul ever so nicely. AND so many, many other reasons! Just watch it and tell me you don’t love it to pieces, I dare you. Click here to see the trailer.

Birdie Scouts 4 life!

January 16, 2020

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I have decided that I need a room in my house that would be similar to the calming rooms used at school. I think we as a population spend too much time in a rush, hurried and expecting immediate results that end up in major stresses. I think that we are always so worried about our successes physically, financially, and in our careers that we push our mental needs out of the way. Or we ignore our mental health all together. I think that our mental health is directly related to how much time we allow ourselves to relax each day. (Don’t quote me or even begin to think that I know how to do that for myself each day because I have not yet figured it out.) Here is the cool thing about a calming room, it isn’t supposed to be used but maybe 10-15 mins at a time, only a couple times in a day. It is intended to be a place where one can find ways to calm themselves. The room has soft lights, or a small amount of light with calming music or sounds playing softly and different tactile stimuli to use to help relax. A few minutes to focus on something other that what is going crazy in your life, a few minutes to take a breath and regroup yourself for what is coming next, a few minutes to stop and think about what it is you need, what it is you can change, what would make the stressor in your situation less overwhelming.

I am aware that a calming room is used for specific reasons at schools. I am aware that there are folks in this world who need extra stimuli added to their days for their needs. I am aware that these calming rooms are important pieces to their daily lives. I am in no way taking away from the importance of them for those folks. I am simply stating that it is a great idea to take the time we need each day to let go and remove stresses that haunt our everyday lives. I don’t know if you watch Grey’s Anatomy, but they created a room similar to this on the t.v. show that the doctors use to go into a destress. (And if Grey’s Anatomy is doing it, then we all should! -hopefully you are sensing the sarcasm here). I do genuinely think that penciling in some time, into our very busy filled adult days, that we can just relax is an absolute necessity in life. Plus, the color shifting tiles that are in the calming room I was recently in, are so much fun to play with!

Adulting can be hard, and extremely stressful. It can be overwhelming and exhausting. I requires a lot of time dedicated to work, people and situations that are not always kind to our heads and hearts. So if we can allow ourselves small breaks from all of that, to remind ourselves how valuable we are to the world, maybe adulting will be more enjoyable more often.

January 17, 2020

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Today had many things that I am so happy about! Some days are just like that you know? A lot of things going right all at the same time. I will just give a run down of all the amazingness that happened!

1. My Little guy tested negative for the flu. Or maybe he did not test positive, I am not sure how to put that in the correct terms. Point is, he does not have the flu, halleluiah!

2. My oldest went to her first middle school dance, dressed up and everything! The school did a Decades theme and my beauty picked the 90s. Here is the completed look! I hate to brag, but she is pretty dang cute! (She’s the one on the right.) She is going to break hearts she just doesn’t know it yet (and I hope it stays that way until she’s thirty, high hopes right…I know).

3. I finished the book I was reading! One Of Us is Next by Karen M. McManus. It is a young adult, high-school based, murder mystery. It is the sequel to One of Us is Lying which I could not put down. This one was equally as good and the only reason it took me longer to read it is because I had to sub all week. Just as well written and fun to read. I didn’t have any clue who the culprit was this go around, until the very end. I think I might try reading them both back to back to see how that goes. IDK! I will have a review of the book in my Book List 2020 Section of my blog. Read it if you want but do not cheat yourself the chance to check out the book.

4. There are only 4 more wake ups until my husband comes home! He has been in Louisiana for a 10 days and I miss is face!

It has just been a REALLY GOOD DAY!

Today is a good day, for a good day!

Unknown

January 15, 2020

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If you were not aware I will inform you, MIDDLE SCHOOL IS SCARY HARD. I’m sure if you went to middle school and survived it you know exactly what I am talking about. My oldest is in 7th grade this year and it has been anything but easy. Its not like I was expecting it to be simple (Lord know the hormones alone are a daily obstacle) but I also did a poor job preparing myself for it all.

Tonight we spent a lot of our evening re-doing an entire assignment. The directions given were not made super clear (not for lack of effort on the teacher’s part, questions just needed to be asked for clarification). Regardless, we needed to put together an entire presentation with information and slides in one night.

There were a lot of tears and frustration, from both parties (this momma and her offspring). We were both up late, pulling together what we could to finish the job. We were already tired and giving up would have been the easy option. We decided to pull through and get it finished. And in result of our efforts we learned a few things. We learned a lot about how and why headphones were invented. Which, A: is super cool to learn something new, and B: is totally relatable to her life currently seeing as how she wears her ear pod things all over the place. We learned that we can accomplish something together, even if we don’t like each other much during the process, even if we yell a lot and cry a lot and stare at each other waiting for the other to give a lot. We learned that our efforts were worth it because (I am writing this a couple days after the fact) when she returned from school the next day, after giving her presentation, she was complimented on how wonderful of a job she had done.

I guess my joy was found in all of that experience. I found where my patience and tolerance needs to be worked on. I found that my kid is actually interested in learning things (she tells me a lot that she hates school and having to learn, haha, like all kids this age right?). I found that I am more and more proud of her, with each day that passes, and each choice she makes in her life, she is an awesome kid and I love her very much.

January 14, 2020

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This afternoon I shopped with my daughter to find an outfit for her first middle school dance. It was fun looking up ideas with her. The theme for thier dance is Decades and my girl picked the 90s. We looked for a bright colored windbreaker and turtleneck to pair with her Mom Jean’s and converse. Here is the plan.

After finding everything I can not wait to see how it all comes together for the dance. More to come.

January 12, 2020

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Tonight is consisting of creating a new Instagram Highlight and watching Victorious.  Yep, two new obsessions in my life that might not be needed or healthy.  You know what, one makes me laugh and the other makes me feel creative.  So there you have it, watching a kid’s t.v. show that aired, I don’t even know how long ago and loading pictures of lights is filling my hear with joy this evening.  It’s the small things.

January 11, 2020

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Sister got to go to a sleepover so Bubba and I decided to go on a Mother/Son date night.

First we shopped around Ollie’s (a local discount store where they sell items that have been discontinued, overstocked, or have come from bankruptcies ect.)  He loves to go in and see the life size bobble head of Ollie and all the funny pictures that show where things are located (note to self, take photos of some of the funny pictures, they are worth sharing with friends).   We looked through the whole store and found a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle book with a play mat and some turtle figures to play with.  He loves TMNT, I think we have watched every single episode from the last show featured on Nickelodeon at least 100 times.  I love it when the turtles battle creatures from scary stories, vampires, werewolves and whatnot, they are hilarious.  Anyways, this was an ideal find and of course we brought it home with us.

Next we went to IHOP and at some breakfast for dinner.   Anytime of day that we can have pancakes, is a good time of day in my kiddo’s book.  He of course ordered the funny face pancake plate, what six year old wouldn’t?!  Mom ordered the Monti Cristo Wrap, which was pretty good also if I do say so.  We played tic-tac-toe on the back side of the Garfield coloring page he received, he kicked my tush, twice!

We ended the evening with a movie, Ugly Dolls, and some popcorn!  If you have not watched Ugly Dolls yet you must!  With a cast of Kelly Clarkson, Blake Shelton, Pit Bull, Nick Jonas, Janelle Monae, and more, how could you go wrong?  It is adorable, it has a great message (which is why I believe kids love it so much, I think kids crave movies that tell them how to be good people) and THEY SING! So yay, it is a great movie by my standards.

Why, the play by play you ask, well because it is really awesome to be able to spend time with my son just he and I. Sometimes six can be trying, it pushes buttons and tries patience, so to have a night where six can be fun and silly and just chill is always welcomed.  Also, I think it is important to show your kiddos that even adults can let lose and have fun.  Our job is to help shape our kids, teach them all the life lessons they need to succeed as well rounded, fully functioning, caring and aware adults.  Maybe most adults don’t take the time to just enjoy life, on the premise of because its fun, but I think they should.  So yeah, that is why the play by play, because I really had a lot of fun!

Dinner Date with my boy

January 7, 2020

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Do you want the good news first or the bad news first?  Well the bad news is that I felt sad today, the good news is that I was happy also.

Bad news, my husband had to head back out of town for work.  It is a normalcy for us, and something that we have chosen for our lives, but it doesn’t get easier to watch him go.  I miss him fiercely and so do the kids and we know he misses us too.   I am so proud of him for doing what he believes is the best for this family and I also know he works hard and does an amazing job everyday he is away.  His work ethic and dedication to being responsible financially and as a husband and father is something to be admired, at I one hundred percent do.

Good news, Karen M. McManus’ book One of Us is Next, was released in stores today!  And my local library friend made sure that they had the book to check out AND she let me be the first to read it!  I cannot tell you how much that means to me.  She and I have been getting to know each other and I am happy to say that I think we will be good friends.  I am so super excited to start reading this book.   I loved One of Us is Lying!  So good, I am excited to see what the sequel brings.

So today was a little bit of soul crushing and a little bit of soul filling.  That’s life though isn’t it friends.  Being sad is part of this life, and if we learn the best ways to find the silver lining in that sadness, after the time needed to process it all of course, the better the next time will be when we might have to face similar sadness again.   I say cheers to both the sad and happy moments that make us who we are.

January 6, 2020

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All of us can create out own healing packages by thinking about that which makes us feel healthy, calm, and happy.  We can write our own prescriptions for health that include nutrition and exercise, relationships, things we enjoy, and gratitude.

-Women Rowing North: Navigating Life’s Currents and Flourishing As We Age, by Mary Pipher

I started attending a book club at my local library last year and it turns out it is everything I needed.

A. I love to read

B. I love to read and discuss what I have read

C. I love to always be learning, or expanding my brain to think beyond what it does currently.

Point is, I love reading all the books that we are, for lack of a better word, assigned for each month.  I have read some fantastic titles because of it and feel far more educated than I did before.  This, however is not the whole reason that my soul has been filled today.  The book actually is only the conductor to the symphony that is playing the song that filled my soul for today.  Below is a photo of what made me so happy today and then I will tell you why after I show it.

Jan 6 bath pic

Yep. It is my bathtub that filled my heart with joy today.  And here is why, it is MY time.  Time I get to spend all by myself relaxing.  I read books in the bath, I watch shows that I can’t watch with my kiddos around in the bath (and no not naught sex stuff you perv, so get your mind out of the gutter.  Just shows that have a more adult content than I would like my children to see, like the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel or Mindhunters.)  Soaking in my bath allows for me, not only to relax my muscles but also my mind.  It allows me time to unwind.  I also might have an addition to taking baths.  Sorry not sorry.  I will gladly take all the baths a person can stand than take up smoking cigarettes again.

I know you might be wondering why I mentioned the book if my soul filling experience for the day was my bath.  Well for two reasons.  One, I was reading the book in the bath earlier, so there is that.  Two, the quote at the beginning of this post comes from the book.  I love the idea that we can prescribe our own remedies for healthiness.  We are in charge of  doing the things that make us a healthier person inside and out.  So if I were to create my own “healing package” like Mary discusses, it would one hundred percent include bathtime!  This lead me to think about what else would be included in my healing package that I will prescribe for those days when I just need to feel better?  (See why bathtime is so important?  It gives me all the good thoughts.)  Aside from baths to take time and relax, I think I would add reading to exercise my brain.  I enjoy reading but I also think it expands my thinking when I do, and if we don’t take the time to exercise our minds then, well I don’t know what the word for it is clinically, but they turn to mush.  I also think I would prescribe a nice walk, around the block or through the park.  Fresh air, vitamin D, sun and life are all good things to surround ourselves with.  Plus excessing our bodies are good too.

 

Those are a few prescriptions that I would write for myself.  There are a few others that I will list below, incase you need some more ideas.  But for me today, joy was had and my soul was filled, as I relaxed in my bath tub with my bubbles and read my book.

Healing Package

January 5, 2020

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Today was  a slow day.  I did accomplish the task of going to the grocery store and purchasing some groceries.  I found a couple of Christmas shirts on clearance at Target that filled my soul with joy.  Any time that I can find a $15-$20 clothing item on sale for less than $5 is a win in my book.   I bought one for my daughter (who will likely not where it but maybe she will think its cool next year) and one for a friend.  I even made the cashier’s day because when she rang them up and saw the price that was the first trip she was making at break time.   I’m a bargin shopper at heart, if I can get it on sale, you bet your bottom I will.  So here are my bargin finds for today, I hope you enjoy.

5 days of filling my soul, so far I am digging it.  Here is to the next 360 to come.

Bargin Shopper!

January 1, 2020

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Word For the Year

You have to work hard at being happy, just like you have to work hard at being miserable.  I wake up every day expecting all to be good and right.  And if its not I set my mind to making it so by the end of the day.  

-Dolly Parton

I was told about a challenge for new year by a friend, it was something her boss does to encourage and motivate his year.  She told me he choses a word that for every day of that year he can use as a goal.  If his word was achieve, he would do something each day of that year to try and achieve something.  I could be a daily challenge or a step toward a bigger challenge.  I loved the idea so much I decided to give it a try for this year.

I actually loved the idea so much that I am forcing my family to join in with me.  (I say forcing sarcastically, however, I kind of am literally forcing them.  They don’t always enjoy the ideas I have to make our lives more rounded and full.  I am certain that they will see how rewarding it will be when the year is finished and they have learned so much more about themselves. *This is also sarcasm, relax)  This is what I came up with to do each day to remind ourselves about our word.  I started by printing off 2 copies of a list of one hundred words that were motivational and positive driven.  My kids and I went shopping for small notebooks, which we found at the best place on earth, Target.  We then cut out the 100 words from one list and left the other list whole.  We place the cut words in a bowl, so that if they too are like me, could not decide which word out of one hundred awesome words, was going to be the best word for their year, they could simply let fate decide and draw one out of the bowl.  If they are not like I, and can pick a word without feeling like all the other words were just as fantastic and deserved an equal try, then they could simply chose from the remained whole list.  All this to say, we picked words.

20200102_182646

My son started by picking two from the bowl, mind you he is six and both words had concepts that were a little bigger than six year old’s generally think about.  So I gave him the whole list, and he found the word he wanted all on his own, love.  So his goal for the day was to show love to his Mom and Dad, which he did with cuddles and squeezes, because Dad returned home from a long work week out of town.  Mission complete!

Bman Love Day 1
He drew a picture of Me, his Dad and our dog Taylor ❤

My daughter, who is a creative soul in every way, chose her own word to be imagine.  This is 100% fitting for her.  She has an amazing ability to create beautiful artwork.  So for her first day’s goal she simply drew as many characters she could for her wall. She has an amazing talent, which I am absolutely jealous of, and I tell her all the time that she is so lucky to have it.

Kinzie Imagine Day 1
It brings me so much joy to know that she loves Kim Possible!

My word, of course was chosen at random out of the bowl, because I looked at that list at least a dozen times and for the life of me could not chose the word I wanted to use.  So I left the deciding up to fate and…drum roll please…my word for this year will be SOUL.  Soul, seriously soul?  Thanks fate, what are you trying to tell me that my soul needs fixing?  How do you set a goal for soul?!  All I kept thinking was I can’t sing soulfully, I don’t know how to play an instrument, I HAVE a soul (at least I think I do, and that it is good and filled with good things to share with others).  How to you set a goal to soul for the year?

To help answer that question I decided, why not look up the dictionary definition of each word for reference.  That way if any of us are struggling to figure out what to do for the day, like someone, me I was someone, already was, we could use it as direction, me I needed direction.  Definition of soul according to Google, the patron saint of knowing it all, gave two for me to use.  1. The spiritual or immortal part of a human being or animal, regarded as immortal.  2. Emotional or intellectual energy or intensity, especially as revealed in a work of art or an artistic performance.  I was correct, I have a soul or I needed to have soul.  I decided I would make my own definition for the year based on the two.  I would strive to find, create, share and practice things that filled my soul with joy.  That mission could absolutely be managed on a daily, because there are many things that fill my heart with joy.

My day one was a simple task, to pick up my husband from being out of town and enjoy the moments we have with him home on his off time.  I found joy in my son’s excitement to see his father as we pulled up to the parking lot.  I found joy in the fact that my daughter was able to share a funny story with him about the place he chose for lunch, and how her friend was in absolute shock that we would take her to Hooters to eat.  I found joy in his coworker telling him that all their hard work was made worth it when his family comes to get him and love on him.  I found joy that once again he was home with us, safe and able to share in another week of memories.  Yes it was a simple task, to just be, but it was very filling.

Mom Soul Day 1
THIS GUY!  He has yet to choose a word.  I should know better than to ask him to make a decision without giving him plenty of time to mull it over.  When he does finally chose it will be an extremely well thought out choice.

 

January 3, 2020

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Today we went on an ADVENTURE!

We ate somewhere new: Anchor Down

We revisited an old place to see the fish: Bass Pro Shop

We explored to find a place I read about: The Compound

And every adventure should end with a fantastic sunset: #sunsetsofinstagram

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Fill your life with adventures, not things.

Have stories to tell, not stuff to show.

-unknown

I love to go on adventures.  It makes me happy to do something new and go somewhere I haven’t before.  We made memories today, hopefully ones that are lasting.

Where is the last place you went on an adventure?

January 2, 2020

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Yesterday when I picked my word for the year and saw the word soul, all that kept going through my mind was the gospel It is Well With My Soul.  The song really is what inspired the self definition of my soul being all the things that I fill myself with each day.  Every person has a choice, to fill themselves with happiness or to not.  I believe that the way we treat people and life around us is reflective of what our souls are filled with.  I want my soul filled with greatness.  One thing that I believe has greatness in this life is music, and there are so many songs that fill my heart with absolute joy!

My goal for today was to find 10 songs to begin a brand new playlist on my Amazon Music account.  Play list name Fill My Soul.  So that is what I did, started adding songs to a new playlist that I can listen to whenever I need a fill up.  Here are the top 5 I found for today and a little of why they make me so happy.

 

  1. Oh, How I Love Jesus: Sang by Reba MCEntire

First off, I LOVE REBA!  I grew up listening to everything country.  My dad raised us on it being a part of life.  He believed that country artists believed in everything great there was in this world, and I have never known it to be untrue (at least in the songs that I listen to).  Number 2, OH, HOW I LOVE JESUS! I mean read those words, it is the ultimate love song to Jesus for me.  I love to hear his name because it is the sweetest name on earth, Amen! Hearing this sound reminds me just how much I am loved even when I feel like no one could possibly do so.

oh how he loves us

 

“Oh, How I Love Jesus”

Because He first loved me…

There is a name I love to hear
I love to sing its worth
It sounds like music in my ear
The sweetest name on earth

Oh, how I love Jesus
Oh, how I love Jesus
Oh, how I love Jesus
Because He first loved me

It tells me of a Savior’s love
Who died to set me free
It tells me of His precious blood
The sinner’s perfect plea

Oh, to me He is so wonderful
To me He is so wonderful
To me He is so wonderful
Because He first loved me

Oh, how I love Jesus
Oh, how I love Jesus
Oh, how I love Jesus
Because He first loved me
Because He first loved me
Oh, He first loved me

2. Because You Loved Me: By Celine Dion 

This song has been my go to love song for as long as I can remember.  My mom had a friend that made a major impact on my life, she played this song for the two of us one time, and told us it reminded her of her husband.  I don’t remember all of the details but I do remember that he was the love of her life, filled her with such happiness it was hard for her to describe.  This was the only song that helped her feel connected with him after he passed away, and that statement moved in me.   I couldn’t imagine, first off, losing someone that I loved that much.  I mean I think I might have been 10 when she told the story and at that time in my life I hadn’t ever lost anyone that I could remember the experience of.  I remember she cried but smiled at the same time, she had sad joy, sad that he was gone but blessed to have all the wonderful memories of him.  As I think about it now that might have been the first time that I learned that you could have both sadness and joy.  And I learned that both were ok to have, especially when it came to the people who we love the most dearly in life.  I sitll absolutley melt when I hear this song, I look at my husband and sing it as present tense as I can, because I am everything I am because he loves me.

(Major side note and not as romantic, but it is the theme song for one of the best Michelle Pfeiffer, Robert Redford movies ever made,  Up Close and Personal.  I made my best friend Suz watch it with me once, and her reaction to it will forever be one of my most fondest memories with her.  Sorry for making you cry Suz, but it was absolutely neccessary, love you friend!) Michelle Pfeiffer

 

3. The Red Strokes, By Garth Brooks

Truth, ANYTHING by Garth Brooks fills my heart with absolute joy.  ANYTHING!  The man is an absolute LEGEND of country music.  I love everything he puts out.  And even cooler, I currently live 20 minutes away from his childhood hometown.  Its not much to most but to me it one of the coolest things ever!

Anyhow

The point, is that this music video, when it came out was one of the coolest things I had ever witnessed.  The beautiful pristine white piano untouched and unblemished and they just annihilated it with paint!  Or should I say annihilated them with paint, it was amazing!

Fun Fact: “In fact, 6 baby grand pianos were destroyed during the making of the video. It also required 18 white tuxedos, 12 white Stetsons, 5000 gallons of paint, and six days of filming. The video won Garth the ACM Top Video of the Year Award in 1995.” -countryrebel.com 

The song makes me joyful in and of itself, its this beautiful country ballad that talks about the power of love (well love making maybe to be more exact, but I didn’t know that as a kid and still don’t really think of it that way).  The bridge might be my favorite:  “The blues will be blue and the jealousies green.  But when love picks its shade, it demands to be seen.  Oh the red strokes.”   This is also the part of the music video that makes me go crazy like a kid watching her favorite t.v. show and it comes to the best part.  The blue paint coming out of the piano keys and the green pouring out of his pant legs, and then he is scream/singing if you will that when love picks is shade it demands to be seen and that paint comes pouring down out of the sky like a tornado of red just drenching him and the piano in paint, GET OUT OF HERE!   I am not kidding I get goosebumps every single time I watch it.   There are so many reasons why this song brings me joy, but I think it mostly stems from how in awe I was over the video.  It was magic to me and still brings me a feeling of complete wonder when I watch it.  (Another fantastic video to watch if you can find it is Standing Outside the Fire.  Grab some tissues because you will need them.  Legend, the man is a legend.)

The Red Strokes

3. Glitter In the Air: By Pink

glitter

Just listen to it, how can you not love this song? PINK CAN SING YA’LL!  (Maybe you knew that, maybe you didn’t, but now you do, your welcome).  Also did you see the 2010 Grammy performance when she freaking flew threw the air and was absolutely breath-taking! SHE SANG UPSIDE DOWN!  She is fearless and that is inspiring and beautiful.   Pink has always inspired courage in me, I listen to her music and she reminds me of the toughest, strongest, don’t mess with me people in my life.  Its a trait that I don’t possess all that often and wish I had more of.    This line in the song though, it gives me goosebumps:

“It’s only half past the point of oblivion
The hourglass on the table, the walk before the run
The breath before the kiss, and the fear before the flames
Have you ever felt this way?”

Glitter In the Air: By Pink

Everyone can relate to this song in some way or another, and if not they can at least listen to it and say I want that.  It’s beautifully written and beautifully performed.  It exudes strength and desire and passion, things in life that I sometimes have a hard time expressing even when I want to.  The song is encouraging to me to be that strength to be that passionate person I know resides inside.

4. In My Arms: By Plumb

This song means a lot to me.  This song always makes me think of my daughter.  I got pregnant without planning it, out of wed-lock (which to my world at the time was a big time failure), and with absolute no idea what the heck I was doing.   I was terrified.  But when she was born, its like nature took over and I knew that my job was to love her, endlessly, without judgement and forever.  She has the most beautiful  blonde hair, that once was curly q’s all over, and the most incredible crystal blue eyes.  She is the closest thing to perfect in this world for me (and her brother, but I didn’t know he was going to be a thing until after I fell in love with this song).  I would listen to this song on repeat when she was younger, just praying that I would be able to help guide her through the world we live in.  This place is pretty scary from time to time, full of people who do not care a lick about one another, who are out for themselves and will tear anyone in their way down to feel something.  I don’t want her to be broken by those people, or worse be one of those people.  I haven’t actually listened to this in a while and it just reminds me that nothing she can do will ever change my love for her.  She is turning into a beautiful creative, funny, and intelligent soul and I am so happy to watch it happen.  It will forever be my go to song when I need a reminder that she will always be my little girl, even if she doesn’t like me saying so.

101472105-mama-bear-and-baby-bear

 

 

5. This is the Air I Breathe   (Sang by Michael W. Smith but this is a beautiful instrumental by Gregory James)

this is the air i breathe

It is one of my all time favorite church songs I ever have ever learned.  I remember hearing it for the first time at the greatest church camp in Weld County, Homestead Bible Camp.  This is the place where I first learned that God wanted more than good deeds and a perfect being playing the part correctly.  This is where I learned He wanted a relationship with me.  He wanted to know who I was, what I loved, what I feared, how I thought, how I learned, how I loved.  He wanted to know all there was to know about Breanna, because and only because, He created me to be no one else.  This is where I learned to appreciate quiet time, even though I haven’t maintained that much at all into my adult life.   This is the place I learned that people are allowed to fail, to sin, to hurt and lash out and be angry and that God would still love us no matter what.  This is the song that opened all of that up to me as a reality.  It engulfed me the day I heard it.  It filled my heart with hope, it filled my heart with love, it filled my heart with the comfort of knowing that there was always someone there for me, ALWAYS.

This is the air I breathe

This is the air I breathe

Your Holy presence, living in me.

This is my daily bread

This is my daily bread

Your very word, spoken to me.

And I, I’m’ desperate for you

And I, I’m lost without you.

And that’s it, I learned that a relationship with God means that you live, breath, speak everything about Him and that He lives, breathes and speaks everything about you.  (I very much needed that reminder today)